Writing & Journal Exercises

The Climb

She sat atop a mountain without discouraging the world to climb but she had no hope that anyone would for she lives high in the clouds far above the sea.  Who would see her up there thinking, who would ever see her there?  Why would anyone climb for something they cannot see?

Exercise:  This Is What She Said - This is a writing prompt: "This is what she said".   [A Writer's Book of Days: A Spirited Companion & Lively Muse for The Writing Life by Judy Reeves pg. 197]

Nothing To Say Today

Hmm, this is not as much fun as I hoped it would be.  Not a self-generating enthusiasm and more a heavy fisted 'make sure you make an entry every day' feel.  Ah well.

Fascinating the Thundersnow they had in New England.  A rare weather phenomenon apparently.  Here in Ontario it has been a bit colder than norm but nothing exaggerated.

My car has a pile of snow upon it that I need to un-pile so that I can go shopping in the next few days.  Hopefully I can get more pumped up to do these activities.  Lately, I've just felt like hibernating without outside interest pushing me forward.

I'm about to watch Alec Baldwin on Saturday Night Live.  I used to enjoy that show in the very late 80's and early 90's when Dana Carvey was on.  Perhaps tonight they will make some effort to be intelligently humourous - ya never know.

This is what she said when she really had nothing to say.

Exercise:  This Is What She Said - This is a writing prompt: "This is what she said".   [A Writer's Book of Days: A Spirited Companion & Lively Muse for The Writing Life by Judy Reeves pg. 197]

Learning

I've learned a lot the last few days.  One is finally understanding on an emotional level what "You deserve better" meant all those times it was directly expressed to me.   I could intellectually comprehend but there was often a void where I would go, "What does that mean?" or "But how does that apply to me? Doesn't everyone deserve what I can give, and what they can give or not give is the way it is?" 
I learned more about detachment and reached a new level.  I learned today that I don't trust myself enough and that I tend to take "inner flight" quite often.  Lack of inner mobility frightens me and on further contemplation, I am beginning to grasp that the reason I tend to flee is because I have a belief that if I care I will get hurt.  Trust leads to foundation and focus and leads to caring which then, to a part of me, means I will get hurt - and seeing that I care a lot all the time and find myself crying a lot as a result, I surmise that if I am solidly in one place for too long much more damage can be exacted.
And yet one of my biggest contentions about my life is that "I don't go anywhere or do anything" or "Nothing happens".  Which is ironic as it seems that I'm never "here" long enough to create a forward momentum in a fundamental way.   Its hard to explain really.   Basically, my life forces me to "stay put" so that I can trust in myself enough to care about myself, others, the world without fear and desire to flee.  And once I stay grounded and trusting enough, I will move forward actually.  Not just the metaphysical, intellectual, spiritual moving forward that I do with great confidence and ability daily.  This is more, the physical life, emotionally fulfilling, actual experience that I wish to bring into a full awareness and positively supporting reality for me.

And I also learned, to my great surprise, that my Self would prefer I go to bed early and wake up early.  I have been resting when I am tired and will stay up at all hours because I find it is more peaceful to do so.  But I also find that I'm very stressed all the time.  I always attributed to other things but maybe I will try this new (but old conventional) way out and see what results.  It will likely be a challenge to rest so early, but I will give it my best attempt.

Exercise:  This Is What She Said - This is a writing prompt: "This is what she said".   [A Writer's Book of Days: A Spirited Companion & Lively Muse for The Writing Life by Judy Reeves pg. 197]

The Offering

This is what she said when she took the gun to her head, "I can't take it anymore!".  With her other hand she coaxed the gun down, trembling, trying to breathe. 

"Why doesn't anything get better?  Why?!  No matter what I do, nothing."

She dried her tears and sat quietly.  Thinking, thinking of what she can again do differently.  "Maybe if I do nothing and pretend I'm dead, the world will offer itself to me."

So she sat and stared, blinking.

Exercise:  This Is What She Said - This is a writing prompt: "This is what she said".   [A Writer's Book of Days: A Spirited Companion & Lively Muse for The Writing Life by Judy Reeves pg. 197]